It was one of those days. Mind in a tired fog, list of to-dos putting pressure, and errands running me all over. Yup, it was one of those days. Looking back now it is somewhat comical but not then. Then I wanted to cry, scream, and laugh all at the same time. It was one of those days.
The day started with clumsiness. Again and again, I kept dropping things. I even spilled my daughter’s bowl of vegetables all over the floor. Grrrr!
We made our way to the grocery store. I am going up and down the aisles trying to work as fast as I can. Nearing one my daughter has less and less tolerance for sitting still in a cart. She is constantly reaching out…touching whatever she can get her little hands on.
I think I have what I need so I head to the checkout line. As I approach I realize my daughter’s sandal is missing. When did that happen?! I am now regretting putting those things on her. They are super cute but not practical at all! So I turn around. Thankfully it is a smaller grocery store. “Surely I can quickly find it.”
After going up and down every aisle and not finding that bright pink, yellow, and orange sandal I decided it is lost. I head towards the checkout once again. Just feet away a little boy comes along side of me, “Ma’am.” He is holding the sandal in the air. “Is this yours?” “Yes, thank you! I thought we had totally lost it.” My daughter grins at him too.
Now with the sandal and our groceries we can finish checking out. The check out is taking longer than normal. My daughter is completely restless now. Touching everything…the credit card reader, the business cards…reaching down, to the sides, and up. Wiggling her little body and making cries of annoyance. “I don’t want to sit here anymore!” That is all I hear in my mind.
So I pick her up. Surely this will help? Not! What was I thinking? Now my arms are full with a squirming 11th-month-old, and I have to sign a paper. I manage to get something scribbled out. In the middle of all this, I decide to give my daughter a piece of paper to hold onto. It keeps her hands occupied at least.
Finally, the groceries are in the car. I am exhausted. “Let’s go home!”
I get on the highway and all of a sudden I realize, “The paper! She still has the paper!” I look back and sure enough, there is a big chunk bitten out. I pull the car off the road. With a curved finger just like they teach in CPR, I scoop the bits of paper from her mouth. “Awww! I get the bad mom award today!”
These things, in reality, are small, but some days they just add up. Equaling a greater sum than my heart and mind can deal with.
It is on days like that though that I am humbled, I am reminded…I am not super mom or super human. I am just me and all the flaws and weaknesses that come with it. I am me in need of a Savior. In need of a God greater than all my weaknesses.
And it is ok. It is ok to need God. Actually, He designed us that way. We need Him whether we recognize it or not. Whether we choose Him or not.
2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. ESV
Isn’t that beautiful? God’s power is magnified through our weaknesses, and it is in our weakness that the power of the Holy Spirit can move. God is not moved by us having super human powers. He gives us grace and the power of His Spirit on “those days” and every day! By God’s grace, we are made whole, complete. We are equipped…made capable when we feel incapable.
I don’t always see each day as a new opportunity to walk with my Savior and let Him guide and direct me and teach me and grow me but when I do, I see that His grace is sufficient. Love your realness, Melissa. I have been there and will have days like that again because I am weak.