Yesterday marked five years. Five years since a tall, bearded, funny, compassionate man asked me a question. My answer was “yes”. And it has been the best yes of my life. I said yes to a closing of one chapter of life and the starting of a new one.
A new chapter together. A journey with this silly, deeply loving man as my partner and companion. He was my best friend then and still is now. My heart opens wide for him alone. He is the one that knows the depths of me like no other.
While there was a lot of love five years ago it has not been perfect or easy. We have faced challenges. Struggles that have brought us low. To places we never could have imagined.
Our life together hasn’t been a fairy tale but it is our story. And it is beautiful. It is beautiful because we are growing. We are not the same people we were five years ago. We are being changed. Yes, we have fought the changes. We have dug our heels into the ground at times and shouted, “no!”
However, God has been patient with us as we have maneuvered the hills and valleys. We are not perfect. Our life together is not perfect.
I hold a canyon of respect for my husband. I cherish his words and trust his motives. But that doesn’t save me from weakness and sin. I still snap at him for not putting his dirty dishes in the sink. I still get frustrated that he doesn’t see the floor needs to be swept after dinner or the baby has a poopy diaper. I still forget what’s important. I forget to squeeze him every morning, whisper “I love you” in his ear, leave a soft kiss on his cheek and write him love texts.
I move about my day focused on my stuff. The girls, the laundry, the meals, the sticky floor, the diapers, and puddle of pee from the potty training toddler. My stuff to take care of.
But what about that yes from five years ago. The day we got engaged on the Michigan lakeshore. The day I held his hand and said yes to the journey we are on.
Am I loving him or just myself? Am I still saying yes daily? Do I see the man God is moulding right in front of my eyes? Do I see how I can love him, serve him, lift him up? Am I holding my end of our yes together?
Today as I reflect back on the day I said I would marry the tall bearded man I am stirred. Stirred to evaluate and choose to be the wife my man needs now. To give and not hold back. To see his needs before mine. To cherish his heart. To speak words of encouraging life into his soul.
How about you? Where are you at in our marriage journey? What is God speaking into your heart about your spouse?
Proverbs 12:4 A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones. NIV
Philippians 2:4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. ESV
Romans 12:10 Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other. NLT