Meal time. Snack time. Any time food is involved the same response. A fear that it will disappear. All gone too soon.
As she makes her way through to the last of whatever it is on her tray…PB & J, cheese, Cheerios…anything. She reaches her arm at a 45-degree angle, rigid. In a loud, desperate tone, “Be be-be be!”
She does not want it to end before she is ready. She wants to be sure there is more, always more. She wants to make sure mommy knows she is low. Inside she is asking the question, “Can I trust you to provide for me? Give me what I need, desire?”
Can you relate? Have you ever felt this way in your relationship with God? I know I have.
We feel things slipping from our hands. A friendship, job, child, financial status. We feel them turning into vapor before our eyes. Blinking fiercely, trying to get them back. Crying out, “God! God? Do You see this? Do You see my hands are emptying? Put the stuff back in!”
In the desperate places, the places we fear, our hearts question, “Can I really trust You, God? If You take this will there be something else? Could there be something better? How?”
There is comfort in eating our Cheerios. We know what they taste like. They are familiar, “Just keep them coming, God.”
Yes, God wants to give us the desires of our hearts. God wants to provide. As a mother and daughter struggle to see eye to eye. Eventually, the child will give in, trust the parental authority. Likewise, I am learning to let go. To trust that as I eat the last bite, there will be more. It may not look or taste exactly the same however my God will provide. Will provide precisely what I need.
It’s okay. It’s okay to trust. To let go when the plate feels empty. It’s okay because we serve a mighty, loving GOD. And just like you would never let your child starve neither will HE!
Matthew 6:26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? ESV
Psalm 37:4-5 Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires. Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust him, and he will help you. NLT
Job 1:21 “…The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” NKJV
Ps 37 has always been a favorite passage. I especially like the phrase about giving me my hearts desires, desires that He puts in there when I’m delighting in Him. Change has always been hard for me But I have found that when God takes something away, He always replaces it with something better. Yes, trust is the key. Each step of trust builds more trust.